I’m not sure how to write a story – we certainly don’t want to appear “needy or a victim”. We have always tried to live life as presenting certain challenges that we must rise up for to strengthen and develop our own characters. Early in our lives we made it through several challenges and of course, in retrospect, we could have done better. Now we feel stronger and more able to meet most challenges and have found humor, family and friends to be our best support system.
David lamented that it would have been nicer if the doctors had caught this cancer 4-5 years ago because the battle would have been much easier, but Lou Ann Smith told us, “In the last 5 years you have celebrated your 30th anniversary by going to the coast of California and up through Oregon for a week of pure bliss, you have had two grandsons born, you have had your son, Christopher, pay and take you on a trip to Dubai and South Africa with a Safari and across to Cape Town, you have watched another son overcome an adversity with flying colors, you have taken another trip to Dubai and Turkey and spent 3 weeks with the Prince of Qutar in pure luxury, and backpacked on horses through the White Clouds with a guide all by yourselves – all without the dreaded fear and weight of cancer.” Boy was that helpful and renewed both of us to view it differently. Friends are amazing and again we feel lucky with our lives.
David and I met in Boise. He had three children from a previous marriage and I had two. We had the most romantic, although short, courtship. We both were reeling from our past divorces and decided that we were going to just take it easy and enjoy each other without the burden of adding intimacy to it. So he took me out on dinner and dancing dates, walks, meeting at the gym, etc. He never kissed me until the 4th date. He opened doors and was very respectful and he told stories, lots of stories.
One was about a rose. He had bought a rose and had it wrapped up in wrapping paper so you couldn’t see the rose when he gave it to me. He said, ” I was walking by a store and I heard a voice – it said – buy me, buy me for Beverly. I looked around and finally discovered that it was the most beautiful white rose I had ever seen and I immediately bought it for you.”
So I opened the wrapping paper and looked inside and said, “But the rose is red!” and he replied, ” I know, when I told the rose of your beauty, the rose blushed with shame.” We have since laughed and told that story over and over again – I’m sure our sons have used the story on many girls since. And the stories go on and on many are so long and involved but all involve the love of a woman.
We met in September and married in November of that year. We honeymooned in Sun Valley and have always enjoyed going there. Our favorites places in the world are the Redwoods in Northern California and the Sawtooth mountains in Idaho.
David did not have to, but he did, adopt my two children, Christopher and Nicole. It is something we don’t tell many people because it isn’t a difference on how they are treated or how the family dynamic works. Christopher has become very successful in business and his personal life and lives a totally different life because of it. The most important thing is that he attributes his success to David exclusively. Nicole is called his little “piccolo” , an endearing name David gave her, that has stuck. She now has her masters degree, works for Intel with her husband and they raise their family in Oregon. Their biological father was never in their lives and they are always calling David and telling him , thank you for being our dad. It has been one of his greatest joys.
Of course all the children have incredible abilities, joys, love, accomplishments and I could tell you amazing stories about each of them. They are all successful and close to us – everyone calls or visits many times during the weeks especially since David’s diagnosis of metastasized prostate cancer, Stage IV. We have been blessed with so many dear friends and so many people that we have worked with and of course my piano students over the years. We always told the children, “If you have one close best friend, you can count yourself the most luckiest person in the world.” And here we are with so many….How can that be? So many have been so thoughtful, kind and loving over the years, all rallying with us as we face this battle and challenge. Of course there have been tears, and of course we wish it was different, and of course we are not perfect, but we are up to the challenge and we will do what it takes and we will overcome this – no matter the outcome – because we are here to enjoy every minute and second together with our family and friends and filled with love and humor.
I think sometimes the hardest part is the stupid things that come up in everyday life – can’t find something, a miscommunication, a negative feeling, too many chores, organizing schedules of appointments and flights and transportation, and the always in your mind – cancer. Such a dreaded word, yet we are going to beat this together with humor and love.
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Story written by: Beverly
This story appeared first on Real Imprints.